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Last updateTue, 18 Sep 2018 1pm

For those of you who missed my TED Talk, “Passion, Perseverance and PBR: Don’t Let Your ‘Job’ Come Before Your Shows,” here’s the takeaway: There’s no shame in watching TV all summer.

Unless you’re an acclaimed TV reviewer like myself, there’s also no money in watching TV all summer. Should you quit your so-called “career” in order to keep up on Peak TV? That’s not for me to say … but my answer would be “Fuck yeah—tell your boss to take this job and place it firmly in a dark cavity!”

Now that you’re unemployed, here are nine killer series you missed this summer. Since they’re new and mostly only available on pay platforms, you might want to pick up a part-time gig. Hey, I don’t make the rules of capitalism.

On Becoming a God in Central Florida (Season 1 on Showtime): Kirsten Dunst’s wild and weird film career has always been leading up to a dark Showtime dramedy, and ’90s-set On Becoming a God in Central Florida doesn’t disappoint. Orlando everywoman Krystal (Dunst) is out to infiltrate and destroy the multilevel marketing company that fucked her over, and Dunst seethes rage and determination—hilariously, somehow.

The Righteous Gemstones (Season 1 on HBO Now): Following up Eastbound and Down and Vice Principals, Danny McBride’s latest HBO series takes on the easiest comedy target of all: televangelist megachurches. The Gemstone siblings (McBride, Edi Patterson and Adam Devine) live in the larger-than-life shadow of their famous father (John Goodman); they’re also complete idiots. God loves this show (he told me).

The Boys (Season 1 on Prime Video): Superheroes are managed, marketed and monetized by a megalomaniacal corporation—no, not Marvel/Disney. Not in this case, anyway: The Boys paints a dark world where “supes” are power-mad assholes indifferent to collateral damage, and the “Boys” (led by a deliciously profane Karl Urban) are going to end them. Rated MF for Motherfucking Violent.

Sherman’s Showcase (Season 1 on IFC): Like Spinal Tap meets Soul Train, Sherman’s Showcase is a parody retrospective about the greatest 40-year musical-variety TV series that never existed. Host Sherman (creator Bashir Salahuddin) doesn’t care for white people, political correctness or ever removing his shades indoors, and the musical guests (including a perfect Prince ringer named Charade) throw down.

NOS4A2 (Season 1 on Shudder): Horror sleeper NOS4A2 pits supernaturally-gifted teen girl Vic McQueen (Ashleigh Cummings) against immortal creeper Charlie Manx (Zachary Quinto), a quasi-vampire who feeds on children’s souls and then dumps them in Christmasland. (It’s not as cheery as it sounds.) Like Stranger Things without the ’80s cheese, NOS4A2 is smart, scary and just sentimental enough.

Veronica Mars (Season 4 on Hulu); After three TV seasons (2004-2007) and Kickstarter movie (2014), there didn’t seem to be a need for more Veronica Mars—but damned if creator Rob Thomas and star Kristen Bell don’t keep bringing it. SoCal private investigator Veronica (Bell) specializes in uncovering grand conspiracies (and cracking wise); this one just might get her dead. Oh, and Patton Oswalt!

Good Omens (Season 1 on Prime Video): Angel Aziraphale (Michael Sheen) and demon Crowley (David Tennant) are unlikely BFFs caught in the celestial crossfire when the arrival of the Antichrist and Armageddon inconveniences their earthbound bromance. Good Omens is more about friendship and fizzy banter than blasphemy, but the Jesus crispies still hated it—the best endorsement of all.

The Loudest Voice (Season 1 on Showtime): On the feel-bad flipside, there’s The Loudest Voice, the reality-based drama that explains the ’Merican entrenchment of Fox News and graphically details the misogynistic scumbaggery of its architect, Roger Ailes (a barely recognizable Russell Crowe). The bullshit cannon of cable news still entrances the deplorables, sadly; you can’t fix stupid, but you can understand it.

Invader Zim: Enter the Florpus (Movie on Netflix): Invader Zim, a 2001-2002 cartoon about a diminutive alien hell-bent on enslaving the Earth, remains one of the most bizarre and beloved series Nickelodeon ever produced. Even more unlikely than Zim airing in the first place was a revival, but here we are—obey the fist! Enter the Florpus delivers dementedly, and the last 15 minutes are the best drugs you’ll take all year.

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Don’t Trust the B in Apt. 23 (Netflix; 26 episodes): Before she was Jessica Jones, and after she was a Breaking Bad casualty, Krysten Ritter was the funniest bitch ABC ever dared to cancel. Besides Elisabeth Hasselbeck, anyway.

Gravity (Hulu, 10 episodes): But, before she was the B, Ritter starred in this mopey-but-magnetic Starz dramedy about a suicide-survivors group. The show is occasionally as dark-humored as Jessica Jones. Original title: Suicide for Dummies.

Penny Dreadful (Hulu, Netflix; 27 episodes): The just-ended Showtime steampunk soap opera is one part Victorian X-Files and 50 parts crazeepy (crazy + creepy), with Eva Green’s killer performance inducing all of the feels.

Better Off Ted (Netflix; 26 episodes): Ted Crisp (Jay Harrington) works for mega-corporation Veridian Dynamics, an obvious precursor to Mr. Robot’s Evil Corp., in yet another of ABC’s genius comedy cancellations.

Happyish (Hulu, Netflix; 10 episodes): Steve Coogan (stepping in for Philip Seymour Hoffman) seethes hilariously as an advertising man in waaay more midlife turmoil than Don Draper ever drank through. A 2015 one-season-wonder.

The Venture Bros. (Hulu; 26 of 75 episodes): Not just the best cartoon on Adult Swim, but the best—and most densely back-storied—animated series ever, with a richer character bench than the Marvel Cinematic Universe. (Yeah, I said it.)

Birds of Prey (Amazon Prime; 13 episodes): In 2002, long before the DC Comics TV takeover, The WB gave us Batman’s daughter, Huntress, fighting crime and metahumans in Gotham. For DC completeists mostly … or only.

Human Target (Amazon Prime; 25 episodes): And another DC Comics property: a 2010 Fox take on a snarky bodyguard-for-hire (Mark Valley) action thriller. Also starring Jackie Earle Haley (Preacher) and Janet Montgomery (Salem).

The Good Guys (Netflix; 20 episodes): A criminally (ha!) overlooked 2010 Fox buddy-cop comedy starring Colin Hanks and an over-the-top-of-the-top Bradley Whitford as Dallas detectives. Not to be confused with the lesser The Other Guys.

The Riches (Amazon Prime, Netflix; 20 episodes): Killed off by the 2008 TV writers’ strike, The Riches, about a family of traveling grifters led by Eddie Izzard and Minnie Driver, should have been an FX classic, not a footnote.

Invader Zim (Hulu; 27 episodes): Pint-sized alien Zim is dispatched to Earth to prep the planet for takeover, resulting in one of the smartest and funniest cartoons ever to somehow wind up on Nickelodeon. Seriously, how did that happen?

Nikita (Netflix; 73 episodes): Where La Femme Nikita was ponderously talky and (sigh) Canadian, The CW’s Nikita upped the action and intrigue, putting Maggie Q and Lyndsy Fonseca upfront as serious (if 98-pound) ass-kickers.

Boss (Netflix; 18 episodes): Cutthroat Chicago mayor Tom Kane (Kelsey Grammer) keeps his degenerative dementia a secret and makes House of Cards’ Frank Underwood look like a pansy. Another Starz shoulda-been hit.

Lucky Louie (Amazon Prime; 13 episodes): Louis C.K.’s comedy experiment—a cheap ’70s-style sitcom with adult language and nudity—plays even better now than it did in 2006, removed from TV critics who don’t “get it.”

Huff (Crackle; 26 episodes): Hank Azaria starred as troubled psychiatrist Dr. Craig “Huff” Huffstodt in this overlooked 2004-2006 Showtime series, along with Paget Brewster and Oliver Platt. No, no one else has heard of it, either.

Secret Diary of a Call Girl (Hulu; 32 episodes): The professional misadventures of high-end London escort Belle (Billie Piper) are funny, sexy and even educational—and a lot more fun than The Girlfriend Experience.

Daria (Hulu; 66 episodes): Your old VH1 Classic channel has just been replaced with MTV Classic, a new ’90s rerun home for Beavis and Butt-head and its superior spinoff, the masterfully deadpan Daria. Watch it on Hulu instead.

Dead Like Me (Amazon Prime, Hulu; 29 episodes): The oft-forgotten link in the TV resume of creator/producer Bryan Fuller (Hannibal, Pushing Daisies), this is a Showtime dramedy about grim reapers living—and soul-collecting—among us.

Friday the 13th: The Series (Amazon Prime; 72 episodes): This late-’80s horror-cheese had nothing to do with Jason, just possibly incestuous cousins (John D. LeMay and the gloriously big-haired Robey) and cursed antiques.

Sheena (Crackle; 35 episodes): Ex-Baywatcher Gena Lee Nolin played barely clothed “Queen of the Jungle” Sheena in this early-2000s jigglefest that might be the dumbest series ever syndicated. No, definitely the dumbest.

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