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As they say in Al-Anon, QTIP: Quit Taking It Personally. The first step, which took me a long time, too, is that we're powerless over the alcoholic. Overcoming our own addiction is just as hard as it is for substance abusers. Codependency underlies all addiction.
Darlene Lancer, LMFT
Author of "Codependency for Dummies"
www.whatiscodependency.com